As I have laid in bed this week, contemplating life, emotions & everything, hacking up my inflamed & painful lungs and generally feeling pretty rubbish, I have drawn conclusion of a pattern that has formed throughout my life.
It seems that when I approach any kind of transition, my body rebels!
Knowing what I know now, it is obviously the fear of the change that instigates my body's response to take action to keep me still and halt the transition.
- The Tracheitis after my marriage broke down.
- The tonsillitis and impetigo whenever things were getting too much at college and beyond,
- and now this bronchitis, kicking in during my final week in my full time job, before stepping back out into the precipice of self-employment – a leap made all the more scary because of the breakdown which led me back into full time employment in the first place, after my first failed soiree into business.
In my younger years, I would have thought it was just bad luck – poor timing, I must be run down etc. But over recent years of developing a greater understanding of myself as a spiritual being experiencing life in this incredible vessel of my physical body, I know that there is always a message to be heard or a lesson to be learned.
Our bodies and minds are very intricate and clever machines, they work together in perfect harmony to keep us safe and alive so we can remain on this earth for as long as is possible.
Our bodies are our protectors, for all their intricacies and workings that we may never fully understand, their protection mechanisms are blessed with all the grace and intelligence of a mountain bear protecting it’s young.
Sense danger – react!
That is as complicated as it gets.
But what we need to remember is that danger is a perception.
A spider to one person is a beloved pet, whereas will instigate in another the fight, flight or freeze.
In either case, the spider remains the same. It is the perception in the mind of the beholder, which determines the outcome of that person’s action or reaction.
Fear is different things to different people depending on memories, experiences and messages gathered throughout our lives.
As babies we are born fearing only loud noises. Nothing more.
Fear of spiders is often passed on through observation of the reactions of surrounding adults, as is the fear of other things as we grow and learn from those around us.
Fear of inadequacy
- of lack
- of not being enough
- of not pleasing people
- of being in trouble
... These are all fears developed over time, often through misunderstanding of situations, and most definitely through forgetting who we really are, and the pure positive energy which creates worlds from which we originated.
Our fear therefore can be alleviated by remembering those things.
By reconnecting with that source from which everything in existence stemmed, by
‘re-membering’ those parts of ourselves shattered by the separation of our very existence in these physical bodies.
It is in this remembering that we can reconnect with our wholeness, with our perfection, with that feeling of pure and unconditional love of which we are each and extension.
In this place of pure positive energy, fear does not - it cannot - exist.
If only we could reside there permanently! There would be no suffering.
But then, neither would this wonderful planet, this universe, this place we call our physical home exist either, with all its variety, colour, beauty, all these incredible creatures, people, places to experience and explore.
Without this physical experience and its intricacies there would be no expansion and therefore no reason for being.
So while we can sit and long for perfection in feeling - long for only happiness, wellness and an end to all suffering - we must at the same time, find within ourselves a gratitude for all of life as we know it – difficult though that may be at times.
In the end, we are all doing our best with what we know.
There is nothing more that any of us can do.
But if there is one thing we can learn, it is that our bodies are not the be all and end all.
They are absolutely our greatest gift – our vessel given to us to carry us through this particular life experience.
They are indeed intelligent, but they know the fear of the flesh more than they know the joy of pure positive energy.
Our bodies know and fear pain and as such, will do whatever it takes to keep us safe form any perceived threat – even if that fear is not rational or logical.
Our bodies are doing their best for us with what they know.
My body this week is trying to keep me safe in the only way it knows how – it is crying out to get my attention in an attempt to warn me that danger lurks ahead.
So what can I do – get mad with it for ‘letting me down’ when I most need to be taking action?
That reaction I may have had in the past, will not serve me now.
Now I look upon the fear responses of my body with gratitude and compassion.
The best I can do – as any good mother would for her fearful child – Is to love my body and nurture it in its hour of need and fear.
I can thank it for being there to protect me, for doing it’s best to keep me safe and I can reassure it that I’ve got this and everything is going to be o.k.
It is my newly strengthened faith in myself and my unfaltering knowledge that the universe has my back, which enables me now to rise above those primal fears rather than get caught up in their old unhelpful stories.
Just as that same strength helps me to rise above the fears and worries of those around me, where once their seeds of doubt would have buried deep into my subconscious mind to grow in the darkness there.
Nowadays having done my weeding, I keep the garden of my mind clear, feeding and watering only those thoughts that serve me, strengthen me and enable me to grow into the person who always knows that all is well.
What has your body been trying to communicate with you recently?
What thoughts have you been feeding?
Have you been buying into your own fear-based beliefs, or strengthening your faith so you know that when all is said and done - the universe really does have your back?